Cleaning Grief

cleaning up after a loved one, 

after they passed, 

is really a special kind of melancholic torture.  

no one wants to do it. 

it has to be done.  

you could leave it but then we delay the inevitable. 

the selfish inevitability that some one has to clean it,

sort it, 

donate it, 

keep it, 

trash it.  

do i leave it for some one else?  

because it is too hard,

too sad, 

too everything,

too much.  

too, 

too, 

much.  

i did it, 

because it had to be done,

because i didn't want my mother to do it.  

and now, 

i look at my stuff, 

and think, 

it's too,

too,

much.